Change

“... Only God knows what each of us needs to experience and learn. If we insist on seeing things happen our way, we’re not trusting God’s plan for us. A loving God will see that our needs are supplied without instructions from us.” - In God’s Care, June 19

After 582 daily posts - that’s more than 1½ years - I did not blog yesterday... or the day before. And, that’s okay. In fact, I see that it’s time to make a change, to move on. A new chapter has started in my spiritual life. I no longer need this portion of my spiritual practice and can perhaps make an opening for something new. I can trust God to show me other ways to feel Its Presence each day, each moment.

I started writing this blog November 13, 2008 to jumpstart my daily spiritual practice which had been waning. Guidance said it was a way to help me be in fit spiritual condition and to be of service to others. And it has been that - and more.

I’ve enjoyed writing regularly and developing a style. It’s been a journal at times of events that I was able to easily share with people in my life by sending them a link to a particular daily post. It’s been a way to publicly acknowledge and express gratitude for the people and lessons in my life. It’s been a commitment I’ve kept, showing me my perseverance. On and on the gifts go.

I will continue blogging, less than by routine and more by intuition and inspiration. After all, that is more and more of how I’m living my life these days. It will be a reflection of that change.

And who knows, I might land up blogging everyday as Spirit calls to me. In any case, I am confident and I trust that God will supply me with what I need to stay connected to the Beloved Presence and with whatever I need to experience, learn, and wake up.

Success

Success has usually been talked about in terms of material wealth.

When I was in the dungeon of despair during my active binging days, material possessions could not bring me peace, love, or joy. When I came to believe in a Power greater than myself, it was even clearer to me that living a successful life could not be defined heavily in terms of the physical world.

These 19+ years later, and especially in the midst of the current economic, political, crazy times, I have no doubt of the meaning of success. A ‘successful’ day is one measured by how loving I’ve been in my interactions, how peaceful I feel within, and how connected I feel to Spirit.

The principles in the 12 Step Program include: honesty, faith, courage, integrity, willingness, humility, brotherly love, perseverance, and service. As I go about the activities of my day and when I reflect back on it when it has ended, I know it’s been a successful one when I have practiced those principles in all of my affairs to the best of my ability, acknowledging God’s Presence throughout it all.

Principles to Live By

There are a number of qualities I’ve cultivated in my years in 12 Step program which were introduced to me vis-à-vis my addiction. As times passes by, I am grateful to see how very often I apply them in my daily life. Things like patience, perseverance, humility, honesty, faith, etc.; these are principles that sum up each of the 12 Steps.

In providing computer-related services to clients, there are times when I get hung up in my work. It could be due to my own lack of knowledge and experience or a glitch in the software I am using. Most everyone knows how computers can be: you can’t live with them and you can’t live without them!

Over a quick lunch break today, Rog was kind enough to let me vent some of the issues I was wrestling with on my current project, for which I’ve been burning the midnight oil on and is due tomorrow. I told him that although they’re frustrating and costing me precious time, in a way I’m still pretty calm. Rog said, “You mean, like you’re not ready to throw the computer out the window yet,” a situation that he knows I’ve coached clients with.

Wow - yeah, that’s right, I’m not ready to throw the computer out the window yet. I’ve still got patience left in me. My perseverance is strong. I am humble and know I don’t have to be perfect. I can be honest and admit my weaknesses. I have numerous resources to go to for help. Perhaps mainly I’m in this space because these days I know I’m not alone.

I’ll say a specific prayer to Spirit before I go back to this project. And, I’ll have confidence that between God, my positive attitude, and the software vendor’s customer service, my work will unfold with ease and grace.

Thank you, Bill Wilson, Dr. Bob, and Spirit for the gift of a way of life that helps me in all matters, paving the way for me to be “happy, joyous, and free.”

Experiments

Rog’s ‘dowry’ included a bread machine. He kept it idle for a while, then started using it again last fall. I finally got up the courage to learn how to use it a few months ago so I could make breads of the whole grain variety, my preference (I can be pretty picky about some foods).

I usually don’t follow a recipe after the first time. Okay, even then I tend to experiment. Nevertheless, using fine quality ingredients, the bread usually rises well, looks good, and tastes great. However, there are times when the chemistry of the combined ingredients causes my concoction to form something that looks like....well, that doesn’t quite look like a loaf of bread! However, despite its looks, it usually does taste great, which is the most important thing.

Like the bread I concocted yesterday... It never did form into a ball or rise properly. This got me thinking about me and my life.

I’ve not led the life of the average women of my generation, and I’ve not been afraid to experiment and try new ways. Also, I may not always look great and I may not respond wisely in every single situation. But the ingredients inside me are of fine quality: my caring nature, perseverance, joy, laughter, intelligence, honesty, integrity, walking the walk, etc. My ingredients are of fine quality – they are of Spirit. When all is said and done, my light shines. Just like my bread experiments – they delight one’s taste buds.

As for yesterday’s bread... Well, it didn’t rise more than ½ of what it should have, but it turned out super delicious!